Diner Stories: Off the Menu

A good old American diner may just be my favorite place in this world. It’s certainly right up there, along with dark and cozy British pub and my end of the couch. There really is nothing quite like it. The smell of fresh brewed coffee mixed with the sizzle of beef searing on the grill and the low murmur of half-heard conversations punctuated by the chink of cutlery on china.

Daniel McTaggart is the author of a collection called Diner Poems. It’s an evocative work that really struck a chord with me. It’s also the only book of poetry I have ever owned (I don’t consider that to be a failing, so bite me) and when I heard that Dan was putting together a collection of short fiction based in and around diners I knew I wanted in.
More than a year in the making, Diner Stories: Off The Menu is out now in paperback from Mountain State Press. I’m damn proud to be the only Englishmen to have a story included and to be alongside some very fine writers, such as Jason Jack Miller and Frank Larnerd.
You can check it out here: AMAZOD

 

Adios Pardner

It’s time to say a big adios to The Big Adios, well, sort of. A little over a year since we started publishing online, the best short western fiction site on the web is breaking camp and heading off into the sunset. The last story will be published on the website next month. We were fortunate to host some damn fine stories from some very talented writers, unfortunately submission levels never really got out of second gear.

I’m not entirely sure why. It’s not as if there are a whole lot of other places putting out quality westerns. No doubt some of you are now nodding your heads in an, I told you so kind of way and saying how the western is deader than disco. I have made my views known on that subject before, both here and at the ZP BLOG. This isn’t the end of the road for the western or for The Big Adios.

Head Honcho, Ron Earl Phillips has taken the bull by the horns and in May 2014, in conjunction with Ron’s publishing company, One Eye Press, The Big Adios will begin a new life as a quarterly western magazine, featuring 10 thrilling short stories inspired by the Wild West and will be available in both digital and print formats. For all you writers out there, The Big Adios will now be a paying market.

We are accepting submissions through until April 14th to fill the slots for issues 1 and 2. If you are familiar the guidelines on the website then you already have a good idea of what we want, only this time we are looking for stories up to 5000 words, so you now have plenty of space to fully develop your characters and plots.   

I enjoy a good tale of blood, grit and bullets as much as the next guy. But see that box? Good. Now try to think outside it. I would love to read a story about the black cowboys of the Oklahoma Range, or the Asian-American soldiers who fought on both sides during the civil war, or the silver boom towns of Nevada or any one of a thousand other stories that are still waiting to be told. And remember, the American West still exists today; it’s the feel of the story that is important, not necessarily the time or even the place in which it is set.

Full details are available on the ONE EYE PRESS SUBMISSIONS page, so hop on over and as 80’s rock goddess, Pat Benatar once said: hit us with your best shot.

In the meantime please continue to stop by THE BIG ADIOS website; we have some really great stories scheduled to round things off over there.

 

The West Is Just About To Get Weird

Get it here!

Zelmer Pulp is headed west later this month with our new epic collection FIVE BROKEN WINCHESTERS. This time we have invited a friend along and Shotgun Honey supremo, Ron Earl Phillips will also be saddling up to join the Zelmer Posse.

FIVE BROKEN WINCHESTERS spans the whole arc of the western genre from hard-boiled traditional stories of blood and revenge to science fiction and weird western horror. The full line up is as follows:

Obsidian by Ryan Sayles
Red December (A Harmon Brown Yarn) by Brian Panowich
The Atheist by Isaac Kirkman
The Ballad of Jeremy Diggitt by Chuck Regan
The Guns of Justice by Chris Leek
The Last Shot by special guest, Ron Earl Phillips

FIVE BROKEN WINCHESTERS will be available in both e-book and print editions. We are again fortunate that the exceptionally talented Chuck Regan will be providing the book's original cover art. Keep an eye on the Zelmer Pulp website for further updates. This is also the place to go for details of our other publications, special offers, Ryan's transvestite fashion tips and to download our recipe for armadillo and squirrel burritos. 

If you want a little taste of what’s on offer, (the westerns that is, not the burritos) then why not pick up a copy of Brain Panowich’s first Harmon Brown Yarn, BABY JUICE, which is available now for a paltry sum on Amazon. So as Deputy Marshall Rooster Cogburn once said "Fill your hand you son-of-a-b*tch."

Saddle Up

Evening Ma’am *tips hat*

Well, today sees my debut in the wonderful world of western fiction. I grew up on a full fat diet old western movies, they were my mom’s favorites and both Clint and The Duke loomed large in my childhood. So when Shotgun Honey guru and all round good guy Ron Earl Phillips mentioned he was setting up The Big Adios, my first thought was hell yes I want some of that. My next thought was can I actually write a western? I had never tried before so there was only one way to find out.

The end result is a story called ‘Seeds’ it’s a mean tale of blood and revenge (aren’t they always).  I was stoked when Ron accepted it for publication and I was over the moon when I found out that Zelmer crew mate, Chuck Regan was doing the artwork to go along with my story. I can tell you that Chuck’s art is seriously awesome; but I leave it up to you to decide about my words.  

The Big Adios is a new site and it needs your support, so get along there and read, comment and if you feel like slinging a few words yourself, submit.

Seeds – The Big Adios    

Roadkill Review: Brown’s Requiem by James Ellroy.

Everybody knows James Ellroy right? His L.A. Quartet provides the hard-boiled benchmark that defines a genre for many. Even if you haven’t read him, you will at least be aware of the movie L.A. Confidential, based on his novel of the same name.

This work pre-dates that movie by some sixteen years and is in fact Ellroy’s first novel.  Set in contemporary Los Angeles it follows the trials and tribulations of a hard bitten PI, Fritz Brown in his attempt to unravel a complicated case of arson and blackmail.  These old school noir staples are put to good use by an emerging Ellroy and the same wonderful spare prose and clipped dialogue that mark his later works are here in spades.

Brown’s Requiem was written by a man still honing his craft. If you look carefully you will see it in the plot, which at times seems jumbled and is prone to wander. There is a lot of the author’s own life mixed in here too; his love of golf and classical music are to the fore throughout and it can feel a little like you are being force fed with Ellroy’s self indulgence. That said this is still James Ellroy and Brown’s Requiem is a novel worthy of his name.

If you only plan on reading one Ellroy book then it’s hard to look past the big four. Choose The Black Delilah of my personal favorite The Big Nowhere. But if you want an enjoyable and interesting look at how he came to write them, start here.

Roadkill Review: Miles To Little Ridge - Heath Lowrance

I'll make no secret of the fact that Heath Lowrence is one of my favorite authors. His horror - western series featuring the enigmatic righter of wrongs, Hawthorne is right up there for me. Having enjoyed those books so much I was keen to see how Heath would handle a more traditional western so I picked up Miles To Little Ridge on the Kindle to find out.

Miles to Little Ridge continues the story of US Marshall Gideon Miles, who first appeared in the Cash Laramie stories written by Edward Grainger.

The Marshal has arrived in the sleepy Montana town of Little Ridge to arrest a wanted fugitive and bring him back to face trial. But he gets more than he bargained for from the town’s racist Sheriff and a couple of bungling outlaws with some long waited for revenge on their minds. Those who know Gideon Miles judge him by the speed of his hand and the depth of his character, while others who make the mistake of judging the man by the color of his skin rarely have the chance to regret it.

This is a great little tale chocked full of atmosphere. Heath’s writing simply never disappoints and I really enjoyed the wry humor he wove into the grit of this story.  In a time of back shooters and bushwhackers, Gideon Miles rides tall in the saddle and brings an honest to goodness hero back to the written page. If you want to know how a western should be told then read Miles to Little Ridge.

  CLICK To buy from Amazon.

The 7-7-7 Meme

I got tagged on Facebook by Mike Monson and Ryan Sayles with the latest writer’s meme that’s doing the rounds.

The rules are: go to either page 7 or 77 of your manuscript. Count down 7 lines and then copy the next 7 lines to your Facebook status. Well, okay I did all that so I figured I might as well post it here as well. I hope you dig it.

…The rain was shot through with flecks of snow that turned pink in the bubble gum glow of strip club neon.  I dodged behind a checker cab and took shelter in the doorway of a Laundromat. Inside was a large woman dressed in sweat pants and a crop T that would have been too tight on someone half her size. She sat eating raw cookie dough and watching her clothes turn with a thousand yard stare that I recognized from the fox holes of Vietnam. A yellowing sign on the wall above her machine proclaimed, ’24/7 - we’re always open.’ Somehow I doubt this was what Sinatra had in mind when he was singing about the city that never sleeps…

 

That's an excerpt from a story provisionally titled ‘Exit Wounds'.  It has been a work in progress for a while now. I can’t help it; I’m easily distracted by shiny things. I also have a shit load of other stuff that’s just way more pressing, but maybe this one will see the light of day at some point.

 

To keep this going I tagged a few of the Brit Grit boys: Darren Sant, Paul D. Brazill, Nigel Bird and Gareth Spark.  So if you’re on the FB thingy keep a look out.

So this is 2013 AKA The brochure looks nice.

The New Year is upon us and with it comes renewed hope in the belief that this year might not suck as hard as the last. Who knows maybe this one won’t.

I’m not big on resolutions; they usually involve something called willpower and concentrate solely on removing some form of enjoyment from your life.

Plans however, those I like. Plans are fluid; you can change them as you go along and adapt them as things change around you.

I’ve got plans for 2013; some of are already in motion. First up I can tell you that I will have new stories appearing in four anthologies this year. The first one likely to hit the shelves is Chris Rhatigan’s All Due Respect, which includes my story ‘The Honeymooners’. I’ve recently seen the full line up and I can tell you it’s awesome. The guys at Near to the Knuckle have also put together a stellar cast for their very first anthology. Daz and Craig were some of the first guys to take a chance on me and publish my work. I’m honored to have my story ‘Brothers under the Bridge’ included in their debut anthology, which is penciled in for a February release. There are two more a little further down the line that I will dish the dirt on at a later date.

Other writing projects are also moving on a pace. You can expect to see me back in the gutter at the Flash Fiction Offensive with my story ‘Pigeon’. I will also be donning my spurs and six gun at Ron Earl Phillips new western fiction zine The Big Adios. I’m a big fan of the western and was delighted to make the cut with my first ever attempt at writing one. I have a feeling I will be trying my hand at some more stories in this genre.

The most exciting news will unfortunately have to remain largely under wraps for now. Okay, I can give you a little. Isaac Kirkman and I have been asked to join Ryan Sayles, Brian Panowich and Chuck Regan on the Zelmar Pulp crew for their next project; all I can tell you is that it will blow your mind, rock your world and leave your breath tasting minty fresh.

Welcome to the brave new world of 2013 people. Let’s hope it’s a good one.

So that was 2012 then?

It’s the end of the world year as we know it and actually now I think about it, yes I do feel fine. 2012 hasn’t been an easy ride for several reasons; the economy for one, that's spent the last 12 months resolutely entrenched in the toilet, which in turn has left me clinging to the wreckage of my day job, but like the Boss says: you got to learn to live with what you can’t rise above, so screw all that. 2012 has also been pretty awesome.

Roll back one year to the 20th December 2011. That was the day I got an e-mail from a guy named Larry Green, he's the editor of an online zine called Death Head Grin. Back in the September I had sent him a short story called Wetwork, like the other stories I was touting around at that time it had already been rejected by several other places, so I couldn’t quite believe it when Larry told me he dug the story and he was going to publish it. That was the first piece of fiction I ever had accepted for publication. Those of you who write will know how that felt. For those of you who don’t, try to imagine a lottery win and an orgasm rolled into one. You’re a good man Larry Green.

Roll forwards again to today, one year on and I’ve had 18 short stories published, one even made the cut for the new Out of the Gutter 8 print / e-book anthology (I may have mentioned that once or twice recently).  I’ve also got myself a regular writing gig, reviewing more talented folk’s stuff at the Out of the Gutter website. All that counts as awesome in my book, but what has really made this year for me is the help, support and above all the friendship of the people I’ve met in the crime / noir writing community.  I’m sorely tempted to name the names, but you guys know who you are right? Well you all have my sincere thanks.  

I know that my writing won’t pay the rent or make a damn of difference in the grand scheme of things, but it makes me happy and if once in a while I write something that makes somebody who reads it happy too, I’ll take that.

Happy Christmas Y’all.

A word on some words

Well I guess it must be December because all the blogs are filling up with their owner's choice for the best read of 2012. And I don’t see why the hell mine should be any different.

I’ve read a lot this year, though nowhere near as much as I would have liked. Time is the fire in which we all burn and I still have a mountain of books, both paper and ‘e’ waiting patiently for my attention. Earlier this year I stared doing some book reviews for Out of the Gutter, I may have mentioned that once or twice on here already. Writing those reviews has been a blast, but it has, by necessity streamlined my choice of reading and 2012 saw me consuming a lot more in the Crime / Noir / Hard-boiled arena, than perhaps I might have otherwise. I’ll point out the obvious and say that not all of my picks were first published this year, but as I read them in 2012 they shall reside here regardless. Anyway onwards! In no particular order, here are my favourites. There were plenty of others that were good, but these were better.  



Make of that what you will, but you could do a lot worse than dropping your Dollar, Pound, Euro or Dinar on any of these excellent works.

 

Last Call For Alcohol

Time is running out to submit to the shiny new Out of the Gutter 8 Anthology. The doors close on 21^st November.  I’ll let Editor-in-chief, Matt tell you all about it...

Brace yourselves! OUT OF THE GUTTER is back with Out of the Gutter 8: 21st Century Digital Love, featuring contest winners, essays, and new tales of wretchedness and woe alongside 2012’s very best from The Flash Fiction Offensive and the Bareknuckles Pulp Department!

Contest: We will select two stories (one flash, another between 3,000 and 5,000 words) that hit the theme of modern digital love. What’s that mean? You tell us. Guns, girls, good intentions gone bad spring to our minds, but there's no limit on subject matter, setting, or style, as long as it's in the pulp tradition. Pure story, in other words. All submissions for the contest will also be automatically considered for inclusion in the anthology.

 Fiction Submissions: Open submissions for the anthology (i.e., not for the contest) can be your regular ol’ gutterish stories. We’re selecting some flash, some longer. Only requirement is to adhere to the strict quality standards of The Flash Fiction Offensive and Bareknuckles Pulp. Hit us hard, hit us raw.

Non-fiction Submissions: We're also looking for non-fiction and essays on the subject of modern technology and love. Anybody have thoughts on Internet porn? I mean, those few of you degenerates who've actually visited such sites. We've been too busy visiting the confessional (mostly to confess to how much Internet porn we watch). Gmail chats gone wrong? Girls (and boys) gone wild? The suckiness of Instragram? What have you got?

Best of 2012: You didn’t think we’d forget our loyal contributors, did you? FFO and BKP will select the top stories from 2012, based almost entirely on the number of hits that story has received. You want a book deal? Pimp your work! Rack up the hits! Any story published by either e-zine in 2012 is eligible. So forward that story of a meth-dealing dead hooker to grandma’s sewing group and get them to share!

There have been some fantastic bad-ass stories published this year and many are worthy of inclusion. If it was my job to choose (which thank god it’s not) these would be my top picks.

Flash Fiction Offensive:

McRib Therapy Alleviates Seasonal Depression by CS DeWildt

We all got problems, man. Some of us are misguided loners; some of us are dead in basements. Some of us are just giant red, chain-smoking clowns with a busted foot and bad attitude. Who are you to judge?

Bareknuckles Pulp:

Kin by Gareth Spark

Here’s some damn fine Brit Grit from this side of the pond. You can choose you’re friends, but not your family. Well this sure as hell ain’t the Walton’s.

There are also many, many other fine pieces worthy of your time; while you’re over there perhaps you could find it in your heart to humor this deluded pulp scribbler and check out my efforts as well.

The Legend of Johnny Kool by Chris Leek

A Redheaded Woman by Chris Leek

Jacks, Queens & Evens

Back in April this year, I chambered a story and fired it off in the general direction of that award winning home of fine fiction, Thrillers, Killers 'N' Chillers.


I had forgotten all about it, (or maybe subconsciously I just blocked it out) until an e-mail from new crime editor and former Flash Fiction Offensive head honcho, David Barber hit my in box the other week.
David had found my beer stained, unintelligible scribble languishing in his virtual slush pile and actually thought there might be a story lurking in there somewhere. I read it back and thought he might be right, but it would need a major surgery to get to it. I started pounding the keyboard into submission and the result is 'Jacks Queen's & Evens'. It's a story about of two kinds of dealer, backlit by the colorful underbelly of a Nevada gaming town, that may or may not be Reno, Okay it is Reno.

A big shout needs to go to David for his help in knocking this one into shape.

I'm delighted say you can now find it here: TKnC - Jacks, Queens & Evens

The Legend of Johnny Kool

All out of bullets? Well no, not quite. I have had an unbelievable run recently and pretty much everything I've submitted has been picked up; so yeah, I do really need to quit dragging my ass and get down to writing some more. But I still got one or two rounds left.

 If you head over to Out Of The Gutter you'll be staring down the barrel of my latest. 'The Legend of Johnny Kool' is a story I've wanted to write for a while. I guess you could call it fan fiction, but not in the way you're thinking. Celebrity can be a blessing and a curse or so I'm told, it's not something I'll ever need to worry about!

A big thank you goes out to all round good guy, Court Merrigan for having me over to his Bareknuckles Pulp party. As parties go this one is all night spit and sawdust kegger with good music and better company, so why not grab a fifth and head on over: The Legend of Johnny Kool

Dry Lightning

This wonderful weirdness by Mars Robinson is entitled 'Fallout Boy'.
Its the cover to the sixth issue of The Stone Hobo Magazine. Lurking behind it, you'll find one of my short stories.





'Dry Lightning' is set at the zenith of a long, hot Arizona summer, its a tale of endings and maybe also beginnings. I guess this is a little different to my usual noir / crime stuff, although there are still elements of those, it's more about the characters and the paths they walk.

It seems like I penned this one a long time ago, but on checking back I find it was only January this year. The real kicker for me is the event this story is based around took place all of 20 years ago. Whichever way you add it up, I'm getting old. But getting old is a damn site better than the alternative, so I'll take it.

I read the story through again today and you know what, I still like it. I hope you will too. Dry Lightning

The Ties That Bind - Review

Hey, I got a nice little review on one of my stories, posted over a Short Story 365 

Review by Sandra Seamans

'The Ties That Bind' is more of a character study than an actual story, but the writing and the characters keep you reading to the end. This story will stick with me a while as I wonder if things could have been different.

That really made my day. This story also picked up some great comments from a few well rounded individuals with excellent taste! No sock-puppets here, but I'll be buying the first round if we ever meet. You can check it out for yourself right here

 

 

Fall Reads

'Summers gone, day's spent with the grass and sun'. Well that's how '90s rockers The Boo Radleys put it. I'm not sure that we got much sun here anyway, but with the holiday weekend in the UK just gone and Labour day now upon us, I guess that's all she wrote.

 

Pack up the lawn chairs and put the grill back in the garage 'cause next thing you know we will all be scraping the windshield and shivering. On the up side, dark evenings and colder weather make it a lot easier to find time to catch up on some reading and also help increase the daily word count. That stack of books on the end of my desk has grown to unstable proportions and I'm planning on making a dent in it. Here's a few that are on my hit list.

Last Call for the Living - Peter Farris

I've heard nothing but good things about Peter's debut novel and I can't wait to check it out for myself.

Savages - Don Winslow

I know I'm late to this one, but I've kind of been savouring the prospect. Don Winslow is after all the crime writing equivalent of a very fine wine.

Out there Bad - Josh Stallings

Okay, this one's on my electronic pile rather than the physical one, but I loved 'Beautiful Naked & Dead' so I can't wait to hook up with Moses McGuire again.

Outlaw Album - Dainel Woodrell

What's that you say, a short story collection from one of my favourite authors? Oh hell yes.

When I'm done, I'll be sure to post the odd review here on the blog and let you know what I thought. Whatever your reading, have a great fall y'all!

Review – Beautiful, Naked & Dead

I told you I had a few things I thought you'd like, well I think I saved the best until last. Anyone who has the good sense to know 'Give 'Em Enough Rope' is the finest Clash album automatically gets my vote, but this piece of bad-ass rocked harder than Joe Strummer ever did. 

“There is nothing quite like the cold taste of gun oil on a stainless steel barrel.”

The first line of Josh Stallings debut novel 'Beautiful, Naked & Dead' tells you most of what you need to know about this hard boiled wonderland.

Moses McGuire is damaged goods, a casualty of war and so are those he leaves bleeding and broken in his wake. His revenge fuelled ride through the strip clubs of LA and the brothels of Nevada gives Mo just enough of a reason to keep from eating a bullet, besides there are plenty of others who are trying to save him the trouble.

'Beautiful, Naked & Dead' is fast paced, well honed and purrs like a V-8 with the hammer down. There are no punches pulled here, only some damn fine writing. I know I'm late to this party, but like Josh told me “ It's an all night stale beer on the floor strip-club party, nobodies ever late to it.” So if you haven't seen the show, slip a couple of dollars in the G-string and get yourself a lap dance you'll never forget: Beautiful, Naked & Dead

The Ties That Bind

I'm delighted to tell you that I have a story up at Chris Rhatigan's excellent site
'All Due Respect' today.

I have long been an admirer of the quality crime stories over there and it's a real buzz to have one of mine selected. 

'The Ties That Bind' is a story about family. Don't get the wrong idea, I've not gone all Waltons on you. That probably doesn't mean anything to you if you're under the age of 30, but blood is thicker than water or whiskey for that matter and you'll find plenty of both here: The Ties That Bind

I hope you'll stop in and give it the once over, why not post a comment while you're there and let me know what you think. I still have the Prozac  somewhere so have at it, I can take it!

Spare Parts

First up, I feel I should apologize as this is going to be another me,me,me post. But hey it's my blog so I'm going to do it anyway.

The summer edition of Hobo Camp Review is out and includes my scribblings in the form of 'Spare Parts'.

I actually wrote this piece some time ago and promptly forgot all about, but when James Duncan said his next issue would have a Texas theme, a faint bell started sounding. So after I got back from the ice cream truck, I sent him my story. Many thanks to James for giving it a home on his wonderful site.

If you can find a moment, in amongst the time honored traditions of drinking too much and blowing things up, please go and check it out:
Hobo Camp Review - Spare Parts

Y'all have a happy Independence Day, d'ya hear!

Nebraska

I am delighted to say that my short story 'Nebraska' is up today at the excellent Downer Magazine.
Growing up can be hard and sometimes the battles of far flung wars get fought a lot closer to home.
Many thanks to Devon Robbins for letting me fight this one on his pages.
As always, comments, opinions, random thoughts and recipes for chilli relish are most welcome.

Downer Magazine - Nebraska